Giraffe Facts for Potential Pet Owners

Sure, I'd be happy to share some giraffe facts with you!

Very little is known about these majestic creatures, but after many years of tireless research and countless hours spent digging through the archives, I've managed to scrounge together a small assortment of facts about our spotted co-inhabitants.

Giraffes are:

• Not afraid to pee in public,
• A great fashion accessory,
• Perfectly designed for indoor-domestication,
• Taller than Humans but shorter than a Boeing 767-300,
• Ideal for making lampshades out of (roughly 7 shades per square meter of giraffe hide),
• Less scary to encounter in an abandoned warehouse than dogs in the event of a zombie apocalypse, and ...
• Are semi-officially rated 7.4 Denzels (dnzls) of awesomeness,
• To put it into perspective, my roomate's sickly pomeranian gets 0.3dnzls while the Kraken (Post Release) from Clash of the Titans gets 9.8dnzls.
• I've created a diagram (below) to help illustrate this.
  

Ok, fair enough, so maybe these "facts" sound more like "opinions"... and maybe these "opinions" aren't technically recognized by the scientific community just yet.  But!  Give it time, they'll give in, and when they do you'll have the privilege of telling all your friends you knew them first.  You're welcome.

For more info...

Giraffe Facts on the go